Phrases you should never use

Seth Godin recently riffed on how worthless the phrase “May I help you?” is. How it solicits no action, no comfort, it’s basically worthless. I’d like to add another to the list.

“Let me know if there’s anything else I can do.”

This is generally followed after bad news. The response that immediately pops into you, the customer’s mind, and that some are ballsy enough to say, is usually something like “How about what I want you to do?” etc.

This is a great way to tell the customer you just screwed over that you care and show that you don’t. How about instead of asking them some coca-ninny question, you do something? Tell them you understand. Give them a gift certificate. Would they like to get anything in addition to what they had, at no cost? Another pillow?

Anyone have any others?

Don’t let them know

Don’t let them know.

That should be the customer service policy if a customer is “wrong”.

I had an issue with Blizzard Entertainment recently. I contacted what seemed like the right department. They responded telling me it wasn’t the right department and I needed to now contact a different one.

It takes the click of a forward button to send my e-mail to the appropriate department and I would have never known I sent it to the wrong place. The issue is still solved and they would have reduced the friction and frustration of a customer.

Frictionless is the way to go

At the local Taco Bell they have fixed stools around their tables. You see everyone there sitting on the very edge of the stools and looking generally uncomfortable. It’s obvious they feel too far away.

The cafeteria on campus here has been using the same take out box for their food for a while. It’s inconvenient in its shape and annoying to throw away because it doesn’t compact well.

A local deli here called McAllister has a wide selection of items. Their font, however, is too small. I’ve noticed I’m not the only one who thinks so.

If Taco Bell moved their stools closer, people would enjoy their eating experience more. By making the take out boxes fit food correctly and compact nicely, the cafeteria could increase the number of people who buy food there. It costs you almost nothing to make your menu font bigger.

All small things, all big differences, all add up.

Reducing the friction for the people who encounter your business or product enhances their experience. Less friction means less frustration, less time spent thinking, less anxiety, and more time spent enjoying your business or product.

Friction is a concept that’s employed by 37Signals, Flickr, Google, and others. Yet I find it surprising how often it seems to be overlooked in business.

The New CRM

I recently came across a blog I hadn’t read before called Make Marketing History of which had a post I very much agreed with on Customer Relationship Management (CRM). Dodds from MMH says, and I agree, that CRM today focuses on the wrong thing. It focuses on the numbers instead of the people. I say, how about a better refocus of term itself?

Cause Real Memories.

The focus of CRM should be experience -memories. That’s what we’re talking about, the Harvard Business Review even suggested it aught to be renamed to Customer Experience Management- CEM. I think the term management itself is terrible. It’s got bad vibes all over it. We’re talking experiences here. A zing, pop, and pow!

The thing is, I think the software behind CRM has to follow the vision appropriately. Right now it doesn’t and that’s part of the problem.

I recently spent some time implementing new backend CRM software for a financial advising firm. On top of implementing this software, I also had to give a small seminar to the staff on how to use it. One thing I found particularly tasteless is that the software did a lot of one thing for the customer’s experience- nothing. It didn’t help add to the zing, pop, or pow! It was great at storing mundane, database type details. It was bad at enhancing experience. Good thing this firm did most the CRM in their head!

If we use software to help us with creating real memories, we need to be sure this software does that and doesn’t pull us in the wrong direction. For those who want more- There is a book by John DiJulius on creating customer experiences and the appropriate use of CRM focused on enhancing the experience. It’s a fantastic book.

People Keep Score

 

Fairly often something will occur relationally between people (sometimes people I know, sometimes people I don’t know) that gives me a nice little reminding insight about the relationships people have with each other, and how that also works in their relationship with businesses.

I recently over heard (whether I’ve wanted to or not, really) a number of arguments between random people. The arguments may have been about different things, but there was one thing that was consistent in all of them.

People kept score. When their boyfriend said that harmful thing, she remembered. When his girlfriend secretly brought him lunch, he remembered.

In any relationship, whether it is with a friend or your company, when people become invested in something they have a reason to keep score. This means every company needs to do their best to right their wrongs and to go above and beyond. Every company has a track record. Don’t be lazy and let an upset customer stay that way. You wouldn’t let a friend stay that way. If people are keeping score, so should you. Take the time to check and make sure the score is what you want it to be.

Dunkin Donuts has a treasure map

Seth Godin recently put up an image from Dunkin Donuts and labeled it the “missing manual.” Last month I mentioned how companies aught to focus on making a “treasure map” for their customers, making the process of dealing with their company as simple and straight forward to understand as possible. This picture from Seth just backs up the importance of that:

Community to Business Interaction

I’ve written before on my notion of what the ideal relationship between a business and its community is. I’ve began writing in a more full form what I find are the most important points and steps to creating a community are, as well as how to tell whether or not you’re on the right track. While that is not done, I would like to share a small portion from that.

My idea of the ideal relationship between myself (being a part of the business) and the community (the group of people whom we are privileged to have supporting our products) is when I know many (I don’t say all because I am terrible with names) of the members of our community by name, what is going on in their life, and what they are currently up to.

To sum it up in a more concise form: The interaction between a company and the community that creates it should be a relationship. That is, a two way, interactive, respectful, authentic, and caring relationship. 

The above takes a lot of work. A lot. It also requires a lot of caring and authenticity. I used to do community development and marketing for a team (of which I have now switched to design to help move things along) whose community I was authentically passionate and cared about. The results from this, from focusing on building the relationships between the community and between us and the community, were awesome. I could literally call up/e-mail/instant message, a member of this community who was now a friend and ask how he or she was doing. We would chat about my recent move, because they knew I made one. We would chat about how their new hobby was going, because I knew. These are the kind of relationships that create growing communities.

It is a relationship. I think relationships are what really matter between companies and their communities. The products [that make their lives better] and all that business related stuff is of equal importance, but I think those are simply the bridge to what matters- the relationships.

The Rushed Community

“If you’re in too much of a hurry to build a real network, you’re probably in too much of a hurry to get elected.” – Seth Godin

“What at any rate seems certain is that when Friendship bears fruit which the community can use it has to do so accidentally, as a by-product.” – C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves).

The project I was last working on had me spearheading the growth, activity, and general happyness of the community that supported the project. If there was one thing that became very evident to me during that time it’s that you can’t rush the trust that creates friendship which leads to a loyal community. You can only encourage it and try to be a part of it. When you try to rush it, you try to force it. And when you try to force it, you’re not being real. Companies who really care won’t rush relationships, and the people you want will wait for the companies that care. In the end, the results from taking your time are awesome because they’re genuine.

Relationships between people take time. Relationships between companies and people will take even more.

Are Zombies Eating Your Customers?

Then your company is probably producing Corporate Zombies.

This means your company is a zombie factory. You hire someone for their creativity, innovation, past successes, their ‘voice’, etc. But once they’re in you put them through a zombification process and it kills off everything they are except for a few innate functions. This means instead of you having an honest, authentic employee who converses with your community, befriends them, and has genuine conversations with them you put out a worse-then-primitive version of traditional zombies. People don’t like zombies in general. So when you produce a Corporate Zombie, you create an embodiment of inauthenticity with a bad case of cannibalized binge eating.

But the worst part is the community that supports you can tell.

So how can we change this? First we need to understand what’s left after Corporate Zombification.

After Zombification, Corporate Zombies have but a few innate functions left in them.

1. They try to feed their hunger [for money].

2. They listen so they can keep feeding their hunger [for money].

3. They make sure they don’t eat all of the customer, otherwise they reduce the customer’s effectivity when the customer turns into one of your companies zombie customers.

There are some obvious flaws with these innate skills.

1. It’s not about feeding your hunger. While a company does need to earn a profit, it should not be to the declining expense of the customer.

2. Just because you make a response doesn’t mean you listen. Listening only works if you make the appropriate response. Gnawing off your customers arm while they scream “No!” is not an appropriate response.

3. Just because you infect someone with zombie-itis doesn’t mean they will become (or stay) your zombie. If anything, when you infected them they’re now less inclined to do anything for you because you’re the jerk who gnawed off their arm.

I suggest adding some improvements to the traditional Corporate Zombie’s, just like what you might see with 21st century zombies.

1. A cannabilization binge-patch. With the patch, you can focus less on trying to feed an endless need for yourself and more on feeding the needs of your community.

2. Appropriate listening comprehension skills. This means “No!” means no. I realize this will put a dent in your companies army of followers. The upside, however, is it will be a loyal army of followers.
3. Let your community do the infecting. They’ll thank you for it in the long run if for no other reason than being capable of having good hygiene.

For the record, It was pure convenience that I wrote this on halloween.
Happy Halloween :)

Your community is a privilege

The community that supports your company is a privilege, not a chore.

As I have been doing much in the way of online community building as of late, one thing I have been noticing is that businesses tend to treat the community that supports them as a chore more than a privilege.

When you treat your community (customers) like they’re just part of a chore, they can tell. They can tell because you’re still focused on yourself. It’s not about your business, it’s about your customers, and the community those customers create which may or may not choose to support your business.

When business’s treat their community like a privilege rather than a right, they won’t be needing fake antics to encourage potential additions to the community that supports them.